Poem: Ex in the Ocean

I walked right out on the windy pier
And thought I saw your head – bobbing there.
No, not there. A bit to the right. Yes, there.

I told my better half, a blonde Retriever
That I should probably fish you out,
If only I’d brought my pole.

I forgot to mention I can talk to my dog.
Probably should have mentioned that.
Nevertheless, Jessie, as she liked to be called,

She looked at me with those humanbaby eyes
And I knew she was going in the drink.
“Wait,” I called out, for I’d remembered I hate you.

I stood at the railing, watching her sadly.
For on her own, she meant more to me
Than all my Exes in the ocean.

I couldn’t look. I shut my eyes until I heard her
Padding along the pier. I looked.
There she was. Wagging happily, with an old boot.

“Lucky she’s deaf,” I muttered, then mouthed silently,
“Good dog. You found my boot!”
I put the soggy boot on to continue the ruse.

Jessie watched me as I did it. I stood there,
Watching you floating in the distance; then
Jessie went and found the sandal I’d hid in the bushes

She dropped it next to my foot,
Sore from the waterlogged boot,
And looked up at me. “Not impressed.”

B.C